Dilli.. and the love for horan

August 1, 2011 Leave a comment

I am sure about this.

Someday, I will see a resume in my mailbox. Someone from Delhi. With "Other Interests" being "Honking", OR, "Extracurricular Activity" being – "Honked non-stop for 37 minute 23 seconds. To be featured in Limca Book of Records, subject to verification".

I can imagine the lengths that dude (or dudette) would go to if asked probing questions about this hobby of his (or her).

"Ji.. ik dafe ik marutti wala saaid ee ni de raa tha. maine vi vo horan bajayee, vo horan bajaya, bhai ki aulaadein bhi ab mere saamne nai aani ji".

"Sometimes, you are in a real hurry. And you see a traffic jam that’s half a kilometer long. I mean, what can you do? Really, what really can you do? So, I starting honking. Did anything change? NO. Did I feel better? Yes. Damn right I felt better. And you know what. Within 30 seconds, there were at least fifteen other cars that started honking. I am sure they all felt better. That was one instance where I showed true leadership."

Perseverance is a strength. So what, if it’s mindless.

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Musings: The Morning After the Blasts (13 July 2011)

July 14, 2011 4 Comments

We are the children of a comfortable generation. We sit in air-conditioned offices and houses, and we have quips for everything. And excuses too. And it includes me. And it includes you, reading this and making faces.

Around me, there is a lot of ranting. I don’t relate to it. Not much. Not anymore.

Though I liked the crowdsourcing effort that happened yesterday. Where individuals pledged help on a spreadsheet. I’d be curious to know if people were able to reach out to them and avail of the help. Financially, emotionally, locationally, whatever. My fear is that #here2help is a noble notion, but a rather useless one. I tried signing up. Someone a lot more cynical than I can ever be, had already shown (via @nithinkd) why he deserved to be spanked at the age of three, and why his parents should be sorry they didn’t do it then.

My cynicism has turned a new page. My resolutions today have nothing to do with the society. They only focus on me. Why? Because I don’t think I will compromise myself for others. While I am comfortable, I may host 4-5-15-20 other people at my place. So, I can sign up. If I actually do get 15-20 people over, I don’t know what I will offer. Do I even know the right words to say beyond – “I am sorry for your loss”?

It’s all momentary zingoism. You feel sorry for the grieving while you are not one of the grieving ones. If you are grieving, your grief is bigger than the social crisis. You want revenge. And that revenge has no desire to make the world a better place.

If you are safe, you want better systems because you are afraid you could have been on the line. Or, that you will be on the line tomorrow morning. Because, tomorrow morning, you would walk out, get drunk and debate about why you should not be allowed to drive a car and run someone down. Or, jump a light because you are in a hurry to get somewhere. Or, cut lanes. Or abuse someone because he doesn’t seem as smart as you think you are. Or, show utter disrespect to your parents because they just don’t get it. Or, think that you deserve a better salary because that fat lame idiot is getting it. Because, it’s about you.

Morality is the weapon of the enlightened who have not suffered a personal loss. At least, not recently. Several years of rationalization makes your personal revenge seem like a social goal. Eradicate this because it affects the nation, kinds. If it’s not true, then I have found God.  Forgive me for all my sins.

 

(Images courtesy: searches on images.google.com. Credit to the link owners. )

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I see the wind blowing

June 21, 2011 Leave a comment

Sometimes,
Sitting inside an airconditioned cubicle,
As I look beyond the tinted windows
I see the winds blowing, I see the trees dancing with joy
And a silent voice reminds me
Of the sun, the humidity, the pollution

The longing doesn’t subside

I see the irony of my quest,
Of happiness, satisfaction and things like that

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RIP Dadaji… We will miss you

April 28, 2011 4 Comments

For my dadaji.. who left us on the evening of April 26th, 2011.

आज फिर बूँद एक टूट गयी
आज फिर खो दिया है कुछ मैंने
जैसे सदियाँ गुज़र गयीं पल में
जैसे सब ख़त्म हुआ, फिर भी अधूरा है कुछ

अभी कल शाम की ही बात है ये
हाथ जोड़े खड़ी थी एक नज़र
रात का इंतज़ार करते हुए
एक झूठा करार करते हुए
मैं कहीं जाऊं क्यों, इस कोने में रहने दो मुझे
मेरा क्या है मैं बस इस रात का मुसाफिर हूँ
बस ज़रा देखने दो आज भरी आँखों से
क्या पता मुझको मिलें या न मिलें कल ये पल

फिर उसी कमरे के अँधेरे में
अब कोई स्विच टटोलता भी नहीं
पान की डाली वो सूनी होगी
और कोई शाम को टहलेगा नहीं

आज माँ मेरी परेशान ना होगी
पर बहोत दर्द होगा आँखों में
आज ये सोचना नहीं होगा
कौन से जूस से दिल बहलेगा
और क्या सब्जी बनेगी घर पर
और मसाले ये ज्यादा तेज़ तो नहीं
देखो, वो आये नहा कर या नहीं
देखो, वो धोती, वो कुर्ता, वो नाश्ता वो चाय

ना जाने कितनी ही ऐसी वैसी बातें लेकर
ज़िन्दगी का वो एक रूटीन गया
सर पे साए की तरह रहता था जो
आज वो पेड़ किसी झील में बहता होगा

कैसे भूलेंगे वो एक मंज़र
जो जभी आँखों से गुज़रा ना था
कितने सालों से देखा है उनको
अपने पैरों पे शाम करते हुए
आज कंधों पे उठे, आखिरी घर जाते हैं
आप जैसे भी कभी, इस तरह कमज़ोर नज़र आते हैं

कल जो देखा था वो सिमटा हुआ, सकुचाया बदन
और किसी कोने में फूला हुआ, बिखरा सा बदन
हाथ नीले पड़े थे और था ठंडा सा बदन
एक मुट्ठी में बंधा आग पे लेटा सा बदन

कैसे भूलूंगा वो एक मंज़र
कैसे जायेगी साँसों में बसी ये राख की बू
कौन बोलेगा थैंक यू वो घर पहुँचने पर
कौन बोलेगा वो सॉरी, वो हाथ जोड़े हुए

कैसे बदलेंगे फिर वो एक नियम सालों से जीते हैं जिसे
आज फिर  बूँद एक टूट गयी, आज फिर खो दिया है कुछ मैंने

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Maazi/ Ateet/ Past)

April 20, 2011 Leave a comment

मेरा माजी मेरे चेहरे पे छुपा बैठा है
झुर्रियों से भरी ये शाम बड़ी बोझिल है

میرا ماضی میرے چہرے پی چھپا بیٹھا ہے
جھرریوں سے بھری یہ شام بدی بوجھل ہے

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Sreesanth da man?

March 30, 2011 Leave a comment

One of my big arguments before today’s semifinal between SL and NZ was that tomorrow’s 11th man toss-up for India should be between Sreesanth and Chawla. No Munaf, No Nehra. If SL win, India should play Sreesanth, and if NZ wins, India should play Chawla. Now that SL has won it, Sree it is!

Let’s look at SL – they have largely been clinical so far. Except when they lost to Pak. That was also the only occasion none of their top four scored a half century. They did get exposed against NZ this time as well. Let’s face it – SL have a below average middle order (except Angelo, who I have extreme respect for). Moreover, they have four pure bowlers who can hardly bat. So, the recipe to defeat SL is easy to understand and difficult to implement. Get 3 of their top 4 back cheaply.

Pak has been a rather poor batting side getting whittled for less than 200 on more than one occasion in an otherwise high scoring tournament, and a tremendous bowling side managing to restrict the opposition nevertheless. Umar Akmal has been the only relatively consistent batsman. There are no tonners in the side, and their war veteran, Younis Khan, has looked out of sorts. Also, not surprisingly, they have looked more susceptible to pace than spin.

Indian batting has been positive, except for the Powerplay collapses, with Sachin, Sehwag, Gautam, Yuvraj, Virat (and Raina) amongst runs. Indian bowling, on the other hand, has struggled to get rid of top order batsmen. Tamim Iqbal (BAN), Strauss (ENG), Porterfield (IRE), Amla (SA), Smith (WI), Haddin (AUS) – one of the openers has scored a half century in 6 out of 7 matches they’ve played so far. So, it can be safely said that they need something different against SL. The problem with Chawla, Nehra and Munaf is that there are no surprises (barring Chawla’s googly) when it comes to them running in, throwing ball, and going back for the next one. India’s 11th player has been, generally speaking, a value destroyer for the team. Not really contributing much or bleeding sufficiently to cause enough worries in a close match.

This brings me to the conclusion that India should play Sreesanth in both the matches. Sree has some pace, and a lot of histrionics in him, which will come handy. He is not predictable. He himself doesn’t know what he will come up with next, and can produce some unplayable deliveries by design or by accident every now and then. Mohali pitch should have something for pacers. Both SL and Pak have reasonable good players of spin bowling. Lastly, looking at the 12 non-descript overs bowled by Munaf in the last two matches, I am sure MSD can hide Sree in a corner, if required. He is definitely a better fielder than Munaf, and hopefully, will talk sEo much that some opposition batsman will lose concentration.

Let’s spare a thought from Pakistan’s perspective as well. They will have to win it through their bowling. However, it’s the inadequacy of their batting that makes me wonder if they can win. Their bench is not likely throw a batsman who can take care of their woes. They can surely hope that a Younis/Misbah does an Inzamam. But then, Pakistan team hasn’t really every performed up to the predictions. They, usually, write their own destiny, a minute at a time.

However, there is a very disturbing reality to “what happens if Pakistan defeats India”. For one, India not playing the finals would mean a likely 70%+ reduction in the potential revenue from the final (for various parties), just as India playing the finals would maybe increase the currently projected revenues by 20% (these are educated guesses). The producers and directors will have to set the IPL pre and post-production work in full speed right away. Dhoni will have to request Jharkhand Govt. to increase the protection levels for his family. Sachin will be heartbroken. And a nation full of zealots will look for a new religion.

 

Eleventh Hour googly:Eleventh Man

One of my big arguments before today’s semifinal between SL and NZ was that tomorrow’s 11th man toss-up for India should be between Sreesanth and Chawla. No Munaf, No Nehra. If SL win, India should play Sreesanth, and if NZ wins, India should play Chawla. Now that SL has won it, Sree it is!

Let’s look at SL – they have largely been clinical so far. Except when they lost to Pak. That was also the only occasion none of their top four scored a half century. They did get exposed against NZ this time as well. Let’s face it – SL have a below average middle order (). Moreover, they have four pure bowlers who can hardly bat. So, the recipe to defeat SL is easy to understand and difficult to implement. Get 3 of their top 4 back cheaply.

[AD1] Pak has been a rather poor batting side getting whittled for less than 200 on more than one occasion in an otherwise high scoring tournament, and a tremendous bowling side managing to restrict the opposition nevertheless. Umar Akmal has been the only relatively consistent batsman. There are no tonners in the side, and their war veteran, Younis Khan, has looked out of sorts. Also, not surprisingly, they have looked more susceptible to pace than spin.

Indian batting has been positive, except for the Powerplay collapses, with Sachin, Sehwag, Gautam, Yuvraj, Virat (and Raina) amongst runs. Indian bowling, on the other hand, has struggled to get rid of top order batsmen. Tamim Iqbal (BAN), Strauss (ENG), Porterfield (IRE), Amla (SA), Smith (WI), Haddin (AUS) – one of the openers has scored a half century in 6 out of 7 matches they’ve played so far. So, it can be safely said that they need something different against SL. The problem with Chawla, Nehra and Munaf is that there are no surprises (barring Chawla’s googly) when it comes to them running in, throwing ball, and going back for the next one. India’s 11th player has been, generally speaking, a value destroyer for the team. Not really contributing much or bleeding sufficiently to cause enough worries in a close match.

This brings me to the conclusion that India should play Sreesanth in both the matches. Sree has some pace, and a lot of histrionics in him, which will come handy. He is not predictable. He himself doesn’t know what he will come up with next, and can produce some unplayable deliveries by design or by accident every now and then. Mohali pitch should have something for pacers. Both SL and Pak have reasonable good players of spin bowling. Lastly, looking at the 12 non-descript overs bowled by Munaf in the last two matches, I am sure MSD can hide Sree in a corner, if required. He is definitely a better fielder than Munaf, and hopefully, will talk so much that some opposition batsman will lose concentration.

Coming back to today’s match;Let’s spare a thought from Pakistan’s perspective as well. They will have to win it through their bowling. However, it’s the inadequacy of their batting that makes me wonder if they can win. Their bench is not likely throw a batsman who can take care of their woes. They can surely hope that a Younis/Misbah does an Inzamam. But then, Pakistan team hasn’t really every performed up to the predictions. They, usually, write their own destiny, a minute at a time.

However, there is a very disturbing reality to “what happens if Pakistan defeats India”. For one, India not playing the finals would mean a likely 70%+ reduction in the potential revenue from the final (for various parties), just as India playing the finals would maybe increase the currently projected revenues by 20% (these are educated guesses). The producers and directors will have to set the IPL pre and post-production work in full speed right away. Sachin will be heartbroken. And a nation full of zealots will look for a new religion.

Dhoni will have to request Jharkhand Govt. to increase the protection levels for his family. Maybe its time for another eleventh hour googly from him and get Sree in.

 

[AD1]Do u want it after 3rd and 4th para…talk of pak side first and then Srilanka as first matc h is Pakistan. Migfht go better after the intro

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India-Pak Semi: The Pinnacle of Advertising in India

March 30, 2011 1 Comment

Today should be noted in the books of history. It doesn’t happen too often. And it’s unlikely to happen again in the next 8 years. As India play Pakistan in the semifinal of Cricket World Cup, the world of adveritsing would have changed, and the price barriers would have set a new benchmark for how expensive an ad slot can be. It will be interesting if any weed smoking son of the gun can calculate the real ROI of an ad slot today.
Here’s the opportunity (the ‘for dummies” version) –

  • Everyone’s watching – It’s that one topic. If you are marginally aware of cricket, you’d be watching it. If you’re not, then you’d be forced to, because the others won’t let you put anything else on the tube.
  • The same thing – The match is being telecast on three channels I guess- DD, Star Cricket, Star Sports. Each of them have their reach and captive audience. English speaking audience would prefer Star Cricket, given the commentator panel. DD would be the default for the parts of the country where people don’t still have cable tv/ set top boxes.
  • And they are confident India would win – the confidence of the nation, because despite the relative strengths or weaknesses, Pakistan has never defeated India in a world cup match. Oz and SL have. And that’s why the emotions are a lot more subdued. Lots of critics would weigh the balance of the two sides. And lots of people on the street would feel that we are going to the final. Its as much a celebration as it is an encounter
  • Yet they expect it and want it to be competitive – It has usually been like that. And more so in our head than in reality. A 50 run partnership in another match can be seen as normal, but would be seen as a high pressure situation for the bowling side today. So, people are going to take it to the wire, irrespective of the end score.
  • Without any lapse of attention – Its an 8 hour+ marathon. That tension would means a higher adrenalin rush, and greater attention to the most minute details of your ad. People will be all eyes and ears. They will watch just that one channel, and will keep looking for it. Because they don’t want to miss that moment when something happens – that wicket, that boundary, that divine shot, or that cut, or that miss.
  • And will be discussing it – everyone’s a critic today. Everyone has an opinion. And today, it’s out in the open. To the extent, that they would discuss the ads that feature the cricketers to assess how weird/funny/ridiculous it might be. In some cases, those ad taglines would be used in the context of the match. Imagine Shoaib bowling a bouncer to Sachin and thousands of people quipping – aisi delivery khelne ke liye protection chahiye.
  • In their rooms – Quite like the superbowl, there is a frenzy in metros and villages alike. Inverters/ Batteries/ Generators have been arranged for and charged to ensure that a power failure does not stop them from watching the match. Watch-dos have been organized by people inviting friends/ family/ colleagues. Offices have arranged for projects and audio systems for large hall screenings. And people will be reaching early to get their prized seats early.
  • Or, on the internet – If OZ match was an indication – half the internet generation of India would be tweeting/facebooking about the match, with their emotions out in the open. There will less analysis, and more expression of the moment. Y
  • And will remember – Yes. We may not remember what the boss said this morning. But we are pretty good at remembering that six Sachin Tendulkar hit of Kasprowicz in that Desert Storm innings, or the exact shape of the Venkatesh Prasad delivery that took care of Aamir Sohail. And Sehwag ki Maa stays as one of the most epic ads (in terms of recall) ever. I won’t be surprised if Yuvraj’s Revital and bhaag daud se bhari zindagi might be the next one.
  • If they like or dislike something – the opinions and expressions are not always about things people dislike. It covers the likes, the neutrals, the sharpness or the dimwittedness of the moment, analysis of players, analysis of commentators, ads, presentation ceremony and everything else.
  • And while doing all this, they are consuming! Let’s not forget that these viewers will also be guzzling down large quantities of drinks (Alocholic and non-alocholic) with chips, popcorns, dine-in orders, kebabs, pakodas and what nots. Unless the delivery guy of the neighborhood shop refuses to go for delivery today, or the ever so accommodating mothers and wives decide to join the cricket party.

What you are assured of is an assured and a HUGE number of viewers who’d not flip the channel even as you beam them with the most inane and absurd ads, and there are quite a few of them. What you gonna do that’s gonna leave a name for you? In advertising, there cannot be bad recall, as long as there is recall.
And yes, its also a day where the nation’s collective productivity loss would have most likely offset any commercial return possible. Even the Prime Minister is not working. Yet, wouldn’t the ultimate master of ceremonies say – “People of India, and People of the World, ARE YOU HAVING FUN?”

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Is Winning Everything?

March 25, 2011 Leave a comment

It’s a fairly serious question. For someone like me who would like to tell his team every day that its not. Because winning anyway happens while you are trying to become better than yourself. Someone quoted on Twitter the other day – I get worried when people are more passionate about success than being passionate about the things that they love to do.

The debate cropped up yesterday during the India-Australia QF match (where else, but on twitter) with a friend. I have a fundamental disconnect with abusive cricket, people walking down to the batsmen and trying to sledge them out, or generally creating a muck of what’s otherwise such a beautiful feeling of competing to win. And in that sense, a leader which encourages that is more so at guilt than the player who does it. To me, that leader can be a great competitor in the game, but never a legend.

You probably know by now that I am referring to Ricky Ponting. The man is a batsman almost as good as any that most of us have seen in our lifetime. Not surprisingly, Twitter Intellgensia (Twigensia?) was quite unnerved by the boos received by Ricky Ponting, given he is a “legend” with prodigious talent. However, Ricky Ponting needs to ask himself if he deserved that. The answer is a resounding Yes. And its not true just of him. Harbhajan Singh and Sreesanth from our own team deserve some of that whenever they face fans of other countries, because they represent not the game, but this sick notion of winning is everything, and I shall win at any cost. I am sure there are as many quotes supporting Lombardi’s “winning is everything”, as there are opposing with a “how you played the game”. To set the contxt, unlike many, I am not one of those who looks at India’s sledging fest against Aussies in the series down under as – “Damn right, time to give them back” with great admiration. I still believe in a hostile spell of fast bowling shaking the batsman, or some Sehwagian aggression in batting destroying the line and length of a bowler being far more telling than the choicest abuses about who’s mother is sleeping with whom.

And hence, my conclusion is that Ricky Ponting, one of the grittiest batsman today, does not come close to being a true sportsman, for what he lacks is the spirit to play fair and square. If he is so good a player in such an excellent team (which I believe that he is, but probably he himself does not), why hide behind the cover of cheating, abuses, panic and blame-gaming whenever something is not going your way. The question has never been about his batting skills or his prodigious talent or the indisputable champion that Australian team has been. The question is – whether he needs to do what he does to win the game. Most likely, the answer is no. Victory is insecure. Greatness/Legend is not.

And for me, the logic extends to day to day life, office culture, music and theatre and movies, sports, writing, anything and everything. Being a cheat, standing up for cheating, being insecure in your victory are not signs of a great person. And while I can, I will keep reminding myself and everyone that winning is definitely not everything. It’s about becoming better than everyone else, including yourself. And if that does not ensure winning, nothing can.

BTW – The legendary ones are usually not known to be jerks. The keyword is “known”. They still might be jerks.

And remembering Ritesh’s quote – “Paisa khuda nahi hota Mr. Das.. par khuda kasam, khuda se kam bhi nahi hota!” 😉

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झील में डूबा चाँद

February 11, 2011 2 Comments

गई रात हमने चाँद को
झील में डुबो के रखा…
नर्म हो गया,
सिला सिला भी…
जैसे चाय की प्याली में
अरारोट बिस्किट का टुकड़ा
डूब गया हो…

चाँद निगल कर रात गुजारी,
जिगर के छाले और पक गए…
दर्द दबाया,
सूखे कपड़ो से किनारियाँ दबा कर
फुलकों की तरह फूले अरमानों का
तकिया बनाया…

रात बहोत महीन थी…
रात के मांझे से कट कर
चाँद झील में डूब गया था…

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Movie Review: Dhobi Ghat

January 22, 2011 Leave a comment

Nope. I won’t even attempt to sound intellectual and say that the movie is great in parts, and the blah blah. Dhobi Ghat did not work for me on Friday night. Dhobi ghat may work for me on Sunday afternoon 3 weeks from now, when I have no emotions attached to a Friday Aamir Khan release. Not when I have just been sitting on meetings all evening, and it is my only way to avoid slowing down my life. And Dhobi Ghat slows down the world around you. Come to think of it, that’s so against the natural spirit of the city that I know as Mumbai.

DUMB ALERT: I would likely look back at the movie five days from now, and I may say that the movie is a good watch. But I was quite bored while I was watching it. For some reason, I could not understand why some people were clapping at the end of the movie. It did not even seem like sarcasm. Maybe, I am not intellectual, after all. What is an investment banking consultant by the way?

What worked:

  • Prateik. Adorable, in the character (for most part) and the saving grace of the movie. Does not seem like a contrived character, not someone you’d want to glorify OR pity, not someone who’s character is clouded in fake conversations.
  • Monika Dogra is reasonably good. But I don’t see how she will move on from that character to any other mainstream character. She can be the next low budget ABCD movie star though.
  • Special mention: background score. For most part of the movie, the movie does not depend on any background score. It uses (apparently), the natural sounds and the stillness of the city. However, wherever there is, it’s poetic.
  • Some of the pictures (still) and the final painting of Yasmeen are beautiful.
  • Some of the camerawork is good, but not as breathtaking as Satya was. To me, Satya still brings out some of the best Mumbai moments on screen (apart from Rimjhim Gire Sawan from Manzil). What’s your favorite?
  • I like the screenplay for about 70% of the movie

What did not work

  • Pace: Extremely slow and uneven. There are times when you almost feel like screaming that you get it, you get it, and we can move forward. But I guess Kiran Rao made this movie as a self-indulgent Sunday siesta movie where pace is not the most important thing for storytelling. The feel and the texture is.
  • Editing: Some of the jumps are extremely jerky. It takes a few reels to get used to the four narratives, and
  • Dubbing: without realizing, I ended up at the Hindi version of the movie. And the dubbing is horrendous. Dubbing is where Monika’s character goes terribly wrong, and Aamir’s character comes out a little better than what it s.
  • Characterization: Aamir’s. Not thought through is an understatement. Seems like this time, Aamir did not get it right. Surprising, for someone who managed to look reasonably convincing as a 19 year old in 3 idiots. Even otherwise, Monika’s character Shai seems lost. I really don’t know why Munna (Prateik) and Shai did not run the final lap. I am not sure why the other random lady in the building keeps calling Munna to her bedroom while Shai (that’s the name, right?) cannot. And who was that random friend of Shai buyind dope? And what was the point of Arun’s (Aamir) family equation? And the casual relationship between Vatsala (Kittu Gidwani) and Arun? And Salim and Munna? To me, the part that worked were Yasmeen and Munna. Surprisingly, Kiran seems more comfortable handling the characters from lower echelons of society (which have anyways been beaten to death by avant garde cinema), but fails to handle the India shining generation. The obsessions and independence of this class are not even semi fuelled.

I can rant about the movie for a few hours. But the net conclusion is – For the want of a better word, its a Bangaali Intellectual movie :). You can IM about it for long, but its dull and its not a movie I’d recommend you watch in theater. But it’s a reasonable one time watch for a Sunday afternoon.

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Poem: Phir Phir… (फिर फिर…)

May 18, 2010 2 Comments

Inspired from a four liner I wrote on FB a few days back…
फिर शुरू होने को है कोई सफ़र आधा सा
फिर कोई हमसे कोई आधी कहानी मांगे
फिर कोई हमसे चार बातों का मतलब पूछे
फिर कोई हमसे बचपन-ओ-जवानी मांगे
फिर कोई मेरी तमन्नाओं के सदके से मुझे चाँद शीशा दे दे
फिर कोई मेरे बुझे ख़्वाबों की ढ़ेरी से उगी शाख का पतझड़ मांगे
फिर मेरी शाम के पोशीदा से साए में कोई चेहरा कहीं रोशन हो
फिर कोई मुझसे मेरी शाम वो रौशन मांगे
फिर मैं कुछ देर तलक रूठ के मुंह फेर भी लूं
फिर कोई मुझ से मेरे चेहरे पे गुलशन मांगे
फिर मैं खुद से ही बातें करता हुआ सो जाऊं
फिर मैं कुछ ख्वाब बुनूं दुनिया से बागी हो कर
फिर से परछाइयों में ख्वाब सा चेहरा बुन कर
मैं उसे मांग लूं, क्यूँ कोई हकीकत मांगे

phir shuru hone ko hai ek safar aadha sa… phir koi humse koi aadhi kahaani maange/
phir koi humse chaar baaton ka matlab pooche… phir koi humse bachpan-o-jawaani maange
phir koi meri tamannaon ke sadke se mujhe chaand ka sheesha de de
phir koi mere bujhe khwaabon ki dheri se ugi shaakh ka patjhad maange
phir meri shaam ke poshida se saaye mein koi chehra kahin roshan ho
phir koi mujhse meri shaam wo roshan maange
phir main kuch der talak rooth ke munh phre bhee loon
phir koi mujhse mere chehre pe gulshan maange
phir main khud se baatein karta hua so jaaoon
phir main kuch khawab bunu duniya se baaghi ho kar
phir se parchaaiyon mein khwaab sa chehra bun kar
main use maang loon, kyun koi haqiqat maange.

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Theater Review: One On One (A Rage Production)

April 16, 2010 6 Comments

I watched “One on One”, a Rage production the day before, and found it to be to quite good.  Given that it’s a collection of 10 short stories, the acts ranged from bad to great, but throughout the 2.5 hour show, I could not find   too many flaws in performances. It probably was the director’s vision of the particular act that did not work for me. And I choose the word “for me”, because there were at least a couple of plays which seemed to be amusing/hilarious for quite a few people in the theater, but not for me.

Act 1- The Bureaucrat –

Written by Anubav Pal, and direted by Kunaal Roy Kapur

Excellent Play/enactment. A bureaucrat’s perspective through three points in his career, enacted by three actors sharing the stage simultaneously.  , the three stages of the bureaucrat’s life were played by Anand Tiwari (Youngest), Neil Bhoopalam (middle aged) and Bugs Bhargava Krishna (Old). All three of them were brilliant. Just as he was in Hamlet-The Clown Prince, Neil was quite brilliant in this one too. Anand is a dude to watch out for.  Bugs I think has been around the circuit for a while, and his mannerisms were probably the closest to a bureaucrat’s. Overall,  great.

Rank – 2nd

Act 2 – Kachre Ki Hifaazat

Written by Ashok Mishra, Directed by Rajit Kapur, and performed by Yashpal Sharma.

The team was illustrious, the act was not that great. And I blame the story for it. I liked the use of the white kafan as the prop, and Yashpal probably is one of the finest theater actors from the current lot. But overall, beyond a point, the story was too obvious, and there was no spunk in the flow. Made it a little boring after a while. And I think there were at least a couple of occasions, where Yashpal’s character was too loud, which was avoidable.

Rank – 8th

Act 3 – Bash

Written by Neil La Bute, adapted and directed by Rahul Da Cunha (of Class of 84 fame), and performed by Neil and Preetika Chawla.

This one just did not work for me. Touching on a rather sensitive theme of how homosexuality is perceived as a sickness by many people in the city, and how the inner violent rages take over without us noticing it, there was something terribly amiss with this one. Not the acting for sure. Neil was good. Preetika was quite good as well. But again, barring a couple of moments, rather than portraying the dark side of things, I felt that the play trivialized a lot of the dark sentiments it touched upon.

Rank– 10th

Act 4 – White on White

Written by Maia Katrak, directed by Pushan Kripalani and Enacted by Shernaz Patel and Imran Adil.

I can’t understand why they put Imran in the play, because he just sat there with his back to the audience throughout. Not a dialogue, not a significant movement. He was a prop, and a  non-human prop could have been as good. Shernaz’s performance started a little shaky, but by the end of the act, you could empathize with all her emotions of a mother. The dialogues were a little overbearing and heavy, but I felt Shernaz did a decent job carrying them through. Overall, I would classify it as an average play.

Rank – 6th.

Act 5 – Load-Shedding.

Written by Farhad Sorabjee, directed by Nadir Khan and performed by Anand Tiwari.

Now, this one was hilarious, and executed brilliantly. Anand’s performance as the lamp-post was the finest performance of the evening, his gags were relevant and hilarious, and his closing act with little dialogues and a lot of facial expressions was a clincher. Rather than talk a lot more, I would encourage everyone to go for the inauguration of XYZ International Pedestrian Crossing aani Lamp-post. This one

Rank – 1st, and by  a good margin.

Act 6- Aabodana

Written by Purva Naresh, directed by Akash Khurana, and performed by Preetika and Anand.

Very light, very involved and very flowing. It was a pretty good performance by the leads, and the stories of outsiders struggling to become insiders and losing a lot of their small-townness in the process was very touching. I am sure the connect is stronger for those who are small towners in their heart. Chote se hi Chote shehar me pale-badhe chote log jo bade shehro mein apni pehchaan dhoondh rahe hain (that’s an old campus dialogue between me and a couple of friends). Aab is water and Dana is food, btw.

Rank – 5th

Act 7 – Hello Check.

Written and Directed by Rahul Da Cunha, and performed by Anu Menon (Lola Kutty of Channel V).

This one was the second worst of the lot. And I tried to like it this way or the other, because there were a whole bunch of people around me who were in splits, I just could not get myself to connect with the party of a socialite inventing acronyms for all kinds of societies that she had joined.  The only funny part of the play was MNS – Murder Navjot Sidhu.

Rank – 9th, and I don’t want to talk about this one!

Act 8 – Dear Richard –

Written by Oliver Beale, adapted by Nadir Khan and Akarsh Khurana, Directed by Nadir, and performed by Rajit Kapur.

Its an open letter to Richard Branson about the quality of inflight services aboard a virgin flight, and uses a whole lot of pictures to talk about the plight of a loyal passenger. The play was trivial, the acting was top-notch. The adaptation to Indian context was equally hilarious. A little over the top, but Rajit pulled it off with his performance.

Rank  – 6th

Act 9 – Creado, Constance

Written by Joanna Murray-Smith, adapted and directed by Arghya Lahiri, and performed by Shernaz Patel.

I found it to be a very interesting and moving play, about the life of a widow coming to terms with life by being involved in too many things to kill her loneliness, and then finding liberation in a different relationship. Shernaz was brilliant, a lot more brilliant than the WoW act earlier.

Rank – 4th

Act 10 – Instant Behosh

Written and directed by Rahul Da Cunha, and performed by Amit Mistry.

I completely recommend Amit Mistry to anyone (from the time I saw his acting in Shubh Mangal Savadhaan), and feel that he is a talent who’s not been used much by the industry. This guy has elevated almost any play that I have seen him be a part of, including some really ridiculous ones.

This play is about a terrorist who does not want to be a terrorist, and is a funny take on terror, terrorism and Pakistan. There is a bit on the Indian media as well, where thinks that Kasab after the trial and everything, will soon be invited to Big Boss and will be the next winner too.

Ranked – 3rd. This one worked very well for me, though  it depended a whole lot on Mistry’s performance. Otherwise, it could have been a Rank2 for me as well.

In short, I think One on One is definitely a good investment for your evening. Many small acts that you will relate to (not necessarily the ones that I liked), and if you go on a weekday, the tickets are for 80 bucks only.  I guess the play is on till the weekend as well. So, go ahead, enjoy…. It’s a fun ride.

Afterthought – Is this only me who cannot relate with my fellow audience when they start laughing everytime an actor utters an expletive on stage, and more so if it’s in hindi. All the “teri maa..”, “behan..”, “C…” etc. are apparently very hilarious. How so? What joke did I miss?

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उसकी खामोशी: Uski Khaamoshi

March 12, 2010 Leave a comment

वो जब उदास होती है
खामोश हो जाती है

जैसे एक तालाब के पानी में
महीनो से किसी ने पत्थर नही मारा
ना कभी हवा चली हो
और ना ही उस तालाब में कोइ मछली हो
ऐसा मरघट जिसमें न किसी कि आहट आयी हो
न किसी की आवाज़

ऐसी खामोशी
दो पल तो खूबसूरत लगती है
फिर चार पल को डरावनी..

मगर फिर मेरी आहट से
जो हलचल होती है
पानी के गोल घेरे पडते हैं
एक छन से टूटे गिलास के टुकडे की आवाज़ की मानिन्द
खामोशी को और भी खूबसूरत कर देती है

और ये लुक छिपी का खेल
सूरज और चांद की तरह
आगे पीछे चलता रहता है
क्योंकि जिस वक्त ये दोनो मिलते हैं
चाहे वो शाम हो या सुबह कि लाली
वो वक्त
बहोत खूबसूरत होता है

wo jab udaas hoti hai
khamosh ho jaati hai

jaise ek taalab ke paani mein
mahino se kisi ne pathar nahi maara
na kabhi hawa chali ho
aur naa hi us talaab mein koi machli ho
aisa marghat jisme na kisi ki aahat aayee ho
na kisi ki awaaz

aisi khamoshi
do pal to khoobsurat lagti hai
phir chaar pal ko daraavani..

magar phir meri aahat se
jo hulchul hoti hai
paani ke gol ghere padte hain
ek chan se toote glass ke tukde ki awaaz ki maanind
khaomoshi ko aur bhi khoobsurat kar deti hai

aur ye luka chipi ka khel
suraj aur chaand ki tarah
aage peeche chalta rehta hai
kyonki jis waqt ye dono milte hain
chahe wo shaam ho ya subah ki laali
wo waqt
bahut khoobsurat hota hai

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Short True(?) Story FW: Worth Reading!

February 18, 2010 1 Comment

Absolutely worth reading once. Doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. It takes very little to make someone happy… and sometime, that’s worth more than a million achievements.

Subject: FW: Worth Reading!

A True Story……worth spending few minutes to read……

"My wife called, ‘How long will you be with that newspaper? Will you come here and make your darling daughter eat her food?

I tossed the paper away and rushed to the scene. My only daughter, Sindu, looked frightened; tears were welling up in her eyes. In front of her was a bowl filled to its brim with curd rice. Sindu is a nice child, quite intelligent for her age.

I cleared my throat and picked up the bowl. ‘Sindu, darling, why don’t you take a few mouthful of this curd rice? Just for Dad’s sake, dear’.

Sindu softened a bit and wiped her tears with the back of her hands. ‘Ok, Dad. I will eat – not just a few mouthfuls, but the whole lot of this. But, you should…’ Sindu hesitated. ‘Dad, if I eat this entire curd Rice, will you give me whatever I ask for?’

‘Promise’. I covered the pink soft hand extended by my daughter with mine, and clinched the deal. Now I became a bit anxious. ‘Sindu, dear, you shouldn’t insist on getting a computer or any such expensive items. Dad does not have that kind of money right now. Ok?’

‘No, Dad. I do not want anything expensive’. Slowly and painfully, she finished eating the whole quantity. I was silently angry with my wife and my mother for forcing my child to eat something that she detested.

After the ordeal was through, Sindu came to me with her eyes wide with expectation. All our attention was on her.
‘Dad, I want to have my head shaved off, this Sunday!’ was her demand.
‘Atrocious!’ shouted my wife, ‘A girl child having her head shaved off? Impossible!’
‘Never in our family!’ My mother rasped.. ‘She has been watching too much of television. Our culture is getting totally spoiled with these TV programs!’

‘Sindu, darling, why don’t you ask for something else? We will be sad seeing you with a clean-shaven head.’

‘Please, Sindu, why don’t you try to understand our feelings?’ I tried to plead with her.

‘Dad, you saw how difficult it was for me to eat that Curd Rice’. Sindu was in tears. ‘And you promised to grant me whatever I ask for. Now, you are going back on your words. Was it not you who told me the story of King Harishchandra, and its moral that we should honor our promises no matter what?’

It was time for me to call the shots. ‘Our promise must be kept.’

‘Are you out of your mind?’ chorused my mother and wife.

‘No. If we go back on our promises, she will never learn to honor her own. Sindu, your wish will be fulfilled.’

With her head clean-shaven, Sindu had a round-face, and her eyes looked big and beautiful.

On Monday morning, I dropped her at her school. It was a sight to watch my hairless Sindu walking towards her classroom. She turned around and waved. I waved back with a smile. Just then, a boy alighted from a car, and shouted, ‘Sinduja, please wait for me!’ What struck me was the hairless head of that boy. ‘May be, that is the in-stuff’, I thought.

‘Sir, your daughter Sinduja is great indeed!’ Without introducing herself, a lady got out of the car, and continued, ‘that boy who is walking along with your daughter is my son Harish. He is suffering from… leukemia’. She paused to muffle her sobs. ‘Harish could not attend the school for the whole of the last month. He lost all his hair due to the side effects of the chemotherapy. He refused to come back to school fearing the unintentional but cruel teasing of the schoolmates. Sinduja visited him last week, and promised him that she will take care of the teasing issue. But, I never imagined she would sacrifice her lovely hair for the sake of my son! Sir, you and your wife are blessed to have such a noble soul as your daughter.’

I stood transfixed and then, I wept. ‘My little Angel, you are teaching me how selfless real love is!"

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Why r Indians Re-born ? GOOD ONE !!!

February 2, 2010 Leave a comment

Quite funny (Via Deepti)

this is really funny

Why only Indians are re-born ?

The angel Gabriel came to the Lord and said ‘I have to talk to you. We have some Indians here in heaven and they are causing problems. They’re swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing, they are wearing Dolce and Gabana saris instead of their white robes, they are riding Mercedes and BMWs instead of the chariots, and they’re selling their halos to people for discounted prices. They refuse to keep the stairways to Heaven clear, since they keep reaching down midway eating samosas and
drinking chai. Some of them are even walking around with just one wing!’

The Lord said, ‘Indians are Indians. Heaven is home to all my children. If you want to know about real problems,give Satan a call.’

Satan answered the phone, ‘Hello? Damn, hold on a minute.’ Satan returned to the phone, ‘OK I’m
back. What can I do for you?’

Gabriel replied, ‘I just wanted to know what kind of problems you’re having there.’

Satan says, ‘Hold on again. I need to check on something.’
After about 5 minutes Satan returns to the phone and says,’I’m back. Now, what was the question?’

Gabriel said, ‘What kind of problems are you having down there?’

Satan says, ‘Man, I don’t believe this! Hold on.’

This time Satan was gone at least 15 minutes. He returned and said, "I’m sorry Gabriel, I can’t talk right now… These Indians are trying to install air conditioning and making hell a comfortable place to live in by putting out the fire. Since they are so tech savvy, they were trying to start a telephone connection between heaven and hell…I am having such a hard time controlling and dealing with them!! Some were trying to start a chai – pakora shop, which I had to stop…

As a clincher, Satan then said, "I am requesting the Lord to send them back to earth as soon as they arrive as re-birth cases".They are really difficult to handle.

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