You, my friend, are a rapist

The rape did not happen that day.

Some of you may remember this. The males especially. Remember that party where this girl from the office was wearing that dress. And was looking really sexy. And you kept leering at her. No, you were not appreciating her. You were undressing her. And violating her. B50 thinks that rape is a very strong word that should not be used frivolously. And I don’t think I am using it frivolously when I say that you almost raped her that night. You took away her right to wear the dress she wanted to, and still be respected for who she was. And that girl who decided to pick a glass of rum or whiskey in the first office or college party. She must be promiscuous, you thought. And remember that girl who had two different boy friends. She can be a party favor, you wondered. Be at the right place at the right time, you planned. And remember the pass you made at that girl once you were too drunk. Maybe in a hope that being drunk allows you to say sorry later in case it she doesn’t like it.

Oh. And I forget.

You are from the elite group. The IITs/NITs/IIMs/etc. Educated, but by your own admission, not quite used to the company of women. Because you are prone to making funny jokes like – IITs don’t have females. They only have males and non-males. Your father, hopefully, did not tell you to be like that. Nor your mother told you that women are objects. You read about Sarojini Naidu and Florence of Nightingale in your school books. And the Ranis of several Jhansis. And that girl in the first bench who always wanted to be ranked first. That bloody maggu, yeah? Your teachers did not tell you this. Most likely. Yet you turned out this way.

So, what stopped you from becoming a rapist? Some kind of moral code? Fear of being caught and put behind bars? Fear of being ostracized  in case people get to know? Fear of being kicked in the nuts by the girl, or being pepper sprayed in your face? The fear of all your “other dreams” coming to an end for the sake of this one wanton fantasy? The fact that all these years, you’ve been fed by the parents, the teachers and the society around you that it’s wrong? But then, illegal downloads are wrong, and so is making lewd comments about someone behind their back.

Take the some total of all those things that stopped you from crossing the line. Somewhere, in there, lies the answer. Because it will take too long for you idiots to learn to respect women.

I wonder who it was who wrote – “jatra naryastu pujyante, tatra vasate devaah” (जत्र नार्यस्तु पूज्यंते , तत्र वसते देवाः). My country is in the pits of hell. And you, my friend, are a rapist. Because you rape when you get a chance. And you tolerate when someone gets raped.

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